i'm becoming obsessed with pooping.
besides coffee making it easy peasy, and excessive bananas stopping me up, i don't really know how my body
reacts to food in regard to getting my bitness done in a timely and efficient manner. i never have paid attention to
it before. but now i'm compelled.
i have one little nightmare about shitting my pants during the marathon and poop now is all i can think about in
my waking hours.
i read a few things:
one person said don't eat salad the night before a run, another wrote don't eat pasta, yet another eat only steak. i
love salad, i love pasta, steak can take a hike. what's a girl to do?
throw in my major recent coffee reduction and now i'm really freaking out. is being concerned with the yellowing of
my teeth worth becoming a less predictable pooper? how much is coffee really adding to the inflammation in my
arches? and don't even get me started on this imodium crap (pun intended) i keep hearing about. that's
medication right? no way jose! and anyway, does it make you go or stop you up, because i will probably be
buying that stuff.
so what, now i have to keep a poop log? my adored and detailed running log of 2012 turned into my fitness log of
2013 with too many columns that i'm not even using. poop log.
okay, i've tried in vain a few times today, nada, nopers, nothing. and now i'm irritated. i don't think there has
been much poop talk in thegretalist up til now, so it was bound (ahahahhahah!) to happen sooner or later.
couth is not my strong suit, or my long suit. which do you think is the right phrase? al and i had this debate
last week. i was sure it's strong suit. al was ready to go to the grave for long suit. google settled it, we were
both right. so if you said, "both are correct" you are correct. pat yourself on the back, that shows some smarts.
this was on the heels of a big (half) win for me, but a definite lose for al, when the french phrase c'est la vie
came up. i was ready to put up my dukes for "that's life" and al's offering was "no big deal" -- while al's was
correct in tone, it certainly was not the masterful literal translation i was giving as the correct answer with no
hesitation thanks to my two years studying the french language in high school.
sidenote- full disclosure-- in total, i remember the terms la livre (the book-- it might be le livre i never could get the
male and female article figured out, how can a book be male or female? i always got that wrong) and j'mapelle
(my name is) and i'm not looking up the spellings of those french words because ça m’est égal. but then, i
graduated and never ever in my whole life happened upon a french speaking person and thus lost every bit of the
french i never really learned in the first place. why would french be taught as the only language choice? if i had
my druthers american sign language would be offered and i'd have snatched that right up. i'm always running
into deaf people signing and i'd love to barge into these strangers conversations and show them my name sign.
anyway-- we met up with our friends heather and aaron the night of the big c'est la vie debate. and heather
chimes in "such is life" like it was her job to be the smartest person in the room. earned her cred there, not that
she needed to, she's brilliant with maps .. and that's all i need to know about a person to know they are going to
be the leader of my pack. so i was righter than al and half-won that word war fair and square.
so, back to the topic, what's the poop scoop?
